For Deja, better conversations about sex begin with better access to information. As the owner of Better Sex Collective, a sex education platform created to make trustworthy, sex-focused resources easier to find, they have built a space where curiosity can exist without the shame or confusion that often surrounds conversations about pleasure and intimacy. 

Rather than treating sexuality as a subject confined to one kind of experience, the platform brings together education, literature, erotica, sensuality-focused products, and perspectives from creators working across the wider pleasure space.

The idea grew from recognising how difficult it can be to navigate an increasingly crowded landscape of sexual information. Better Sex Collective offers a more considered starting point, with a sex-focused library and dictionary, accessible adult shops, educational creators, product galleries, and Deja’s own writing exploring ways people can become more comfortable understanding their bodies and those of their partners.

Underpinning it all is a belief that reliable information can make exploration feel less intimidating and more informed.

That mission also extends beyond the platform itself. Deja is learning professional translation, beginning with Spanish and later Mandarin, with the hope of expanding Better Sex Collective as a resource for audiences in South America and Eastern Asia. The ambition reflects a broader understanding of sex education as something everyone should be able to access, regardless of language or location.

In this conversation, Deja reflects on the experiences behind the platform, the role of education in making intimacy feel more natural, and the importance of creating space for pleasure without fear or shame. It is a false judgment. Look at what becomes possible when curiosity is met with information rather than judgment.

Filling the Gap in Sex Education

Better Sex Collective brings together trusted sex education, pleasure products, and inclusive resources in one place. What inspired you to create the platform, and what gap were you hoping to fill?

Deja: My inspiration for developing Better Sex Collective (BSC) came from my own personal struggles of trying to find answers to common and uncommon sex questions about things my friends or I were experiencing, and instead of finding unified, easy-to-access answers, there were a lot of pop articles, or they were locked behind a paywall.

BSC fills that gap for the curious and unfulfilled who aren’t quite seeking such a premium experience that they’re willing to pay a subscription but just maybe want to learn a little bit more about themselves or any partner(s) they may have.

Making Sex Education Easier 

Finding reliable information about sex can often feel overwhelming or intimidating. How does Better Sex Collective help people navigate that journey with confidence and without shame? 

Deja: I help sex education feel less intimidating by meeting people where they are and helping guide them to where they would like to be at their own pace. This is done through providing access to various sex educators throughout social media platforms and podcasts, and for people who prefer to learn at their own pace with no other distractions.

I write my own mini-excerpts on various educational topics with the aid of cited books, research, and teachers so that anyone can read and learn from the source material when they’re ready.

Every Voice Feels Seen 

Accessibility and inclusivity are clearly woven into your mission. How do you ensure the platform speaks to people with different identities, bodies, experiences, and levels of knowledge?

Deja: This is my favorite question; I do this by putting accessibility and inclusivity at the forefront of all the information that I learn and present. As seen with my own health struggles, living with a chronic illness or really any experience outside of what is considered the “standard” or “normal” invites you to want to create your own new normal. There are days when you have the energy to try plenty of new and exciting things and then days where just knowing where your perfect spots are will be enough, and my website can help guide you through understanding both. The site is built with privacy in mind and formatted to load with ease regardless of what device or connection you have.

I also ensure that the wording throughout the website is fairly digestible for not only most people who can speak English but also for non-English speakers who use website translators and hope that it is mostly legible while I continue my own personal translation education. This is why I’m slowly building a growing list of international websites for sex education for non-English-reading visitors as well.

The Impact Beyond the Click 

If someone discovers Better Sex Collective for the very first time, what experience do you hope they have after exploring the platform? What do you want them to walk away feeling or learning?

Deja: First and foremost, I hope they feel curious—curious about themselves, curious about their partner(s), and curious about the experiences they’ve had and can have in the future. Oftentimes, I’ve encountered people, friends, family, and the like, who walk away from their sexual experiences unfulfilled or questioning how a good experience could’ve been a great experience. And my usual answer is “Did you talk to your partner(s) about what you enjoyed doing or how you enjoyed doing it?”, and usually their answer is a sort of indirect maybe or no. So more important than anything,

I want most, if not all, of my visitors to learn what they enjoy for themselves, both what they like to feel and what they like to do, and to feel confident in their future endeavors telling their partner(s) about what they enjoy and, vice versa, learning what their partner enjoys to have more satisfying sexual encounters.

The Next Chapter 

Looking ahead, what exciting plans or new directions do you have for Better Sex Collective, and how do you hope the platform continues to shape conversations around sex and intimacy?

Deja: As of right now, I am hoping the platform continues to aid people in understanding that intimacy and sex are natural wants and that they are as normal as liking a dessert or soda. Also, I’ve mentioned before that I’m currently learning professional translation, first in Spanish and then in Mandarin, so that I can expand BSC as a resource both in South America and Eastern Asia. Sex education is a global issue, and everyone deserves fewer barriers to access.

Editor Note

We are often taught to treat sex as something we should simply know about, while rarely being given the language or space to ask honest questions. Curiosity becomes private, and uncertainty can quietly turn into shame.

Better information can make intimacy feel less complicated. When people have access to trustworthy knowledge, they can begin to understand their own desires, communicate more openly, and recognise that there is no single definition of a “normal” experience.

What stands out is the value of remaining curious. Not because we need to constantly seek something new, but because understanding ourselves and our partners requires the freedom to ask, listen and learn.

Replacing judgment with curiosity.

What could change if we felt more comfortable asking the questions we were once afraid to ask?